Posted by Jen

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/summer-lovin-2025

I don't really keep up with you young whippersnappers' schedules, but going by the cakes coming in I'm guessing summer vacation is starting up. Soooo...

Hey, hoopy froods, school's is out for summer!!

You know what's awesome about summer, besides throwing all those pesky grammar rules to the wind?

Jumping into pools of cubed green Jell-O, that's what:

During the Winter Underlined book tour I actually had a whole Q-and-A session derailed by a discussion on the practice of combining Jell-O with cake. Apparently some of you weirdos do that.

[ducking and running for cover]

That's not all summer is known for, though. There's also the ice cream cones:

(Honestly not sure which parts of that are edible...but I'm hoping the answer is "none of it.")

And steaks on the grill:

YUM.

And hamburgers:

(I like how even the fake plastic ants won't touch those "french fries.")

And hot dog pancakes:

This looks like a job for... the Special Pancake Victims' Unit!

*DONK DONK*

And then, after all that food, you get to stuff yourself into a bathing suit:

I actually look exactly like this in a bikini, only paler*. And with more muffin tops. (HEYO.)

(*People tend to think Floridians are super tan, summer-loving sun-worshippers. Hee! SO CUTE.  No, we're the ones huddled inside with the AC blasting, laughing at all you crazy tourists are out there getting heat strokes. We also own more sweaters than the average Alaskan, because there is no place colder in the continental U.S. than inside a Florida public building during the month of June.)

And then of course there are the fun-loving hordes of ants...

I swear these things are solar-powered.

Not to mention the blistering heat...

...and family vacations where everyone's miserable except the organizer of said vacation, who is homicidally determined to have a good time...

[One of my most cherished Disney memories is of the family collapsed on a park bench, moaning, while the Dad stands before them, screaming, "We're not here to RELAX, we're here to HAVE FUN."

"I'm having fun! I'm having fun!"

Plus there's nothing good on TV, and the neighborhood kids wake you up at oh-HAIL-no-thirty with their shrill little screams of glee and stomping feet, and all the parks and shops are crowded, and, and...

Huh. How long 'til Fall, again?

Thanks to Tracey D., Adriane M., Sam H,, Kerry L., Lauralee L., Aj M., Jill V., Julie G., Kristin M., and Becky C. for making us realize just how much we need a vacation.

*****

P.S. If you insist on being OUTSIDE in this heat, especially at, say, an Orlando theme park, at least do yourself a favor and get one of these:

Portable Personal Misting Fan

They come in a whole rainbow of fun colors and cost half what you'd pay at a theme park.

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot:

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/summer-lovin-2025

Posted by john (the hubby of Jen)

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/its-getting-hot-in-here-2025

Today is Heat Awareness Day, so pay attention; this is important.

It's hot.*

*Not applicable in the majority of the North Eastern United States. Or the North Western parts. Or Canada. Or England. Or Australia. Or really anywhere else that isn't Florida right now.

And now, let us sing our traditional Heat Awareness Day song!

The heat is on!

The heat is o -- hon!

[guitar riff] Nanananana. Nananana. Na. Na.

The heat is on!

Nanananana. Nananana. Na. Na.

The heat is o -- hon!

Nanananana. Nananana. Na. Na.

Tell me can you feel it?

Tell me can you feel it?

TELL ME CAN YOU FEEL IT???

"Oh, I can feel it."

Well alrighty then.

Thanks to Julia K., Mary D., Meghan H., Miriam S., Richard B., M.R., & Amanda for keeping it hot, hot, hot.

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot:

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/its-getting-hot-in-here-2025

Posted by Jen

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/the-seven-stages-of-wrecks-2025

Remember, my friends: recognizing the stages is the first step to healing.

Shock or Disbelief:

"No, seriously. Where's the hidden camera?"

Denial:

"That CAN'T be my cake. I ordered a turtle."

Anger:

"This is what you call cake decorating?!"

"And I'm not paying for that one, either."

Bargaining:

"Twenty four bucks, huh?

"I'll give you five."

Guilt:

"If ONLY I'd just learned to bake, my daughter wouldn't be in therapy for coulrophobia!"

Depression:

"I just... I just wanted a nice cake for the party..."

Acceptance and Hope:

"It's fine. I've just got a dirty mind. Maybe no one else will notice."

Huge thanks to Jane R., Jodi T., Maria E., Edmund, Cheryl, Allegra R., Marissa C., and Alexis V.  I couldn't have gotten through this without you guys!

*****

P.S. In case your life was missing a set of cat butt magnets, I found you some:

Cat Butt Magnets

You're welcome.

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot:

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/the-seven-stages-of-wrecks-2025

Posted by Jen

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/paper-reams-2025

There are very, VERY few non-wrecky uses for edible photo paper, my friends. So if you're going to make your guests gum their way through all that ink and extra fiber, at least make sure it looks cool. 

You know, (not) like this:

I can just imagine the baker showing these off in his/her portfolio:

  "As you can see, I pioneered the 'wet blanket' decorating technique. I also specialize in printer jams and making your poop sparkle."

 Or this:

Granted, this doesn't look as much like edible paper as it does a thin plastic table cloth. Maybe it comes with a pair of scissors for serving? (Only let's hope the scissors come on the outside this time.)

And I love how they wrapped the (presumably) iced cake in "paper," then added more icing, and then topped it with (more?) plastic. It's like a Dagwood sandwich of choking hazards.

My favorite, though, is what Angela N. got when she ordered Avengers themed cupcakes from a national chain store bakery which I am *this* close to outing, because omigosh are you kidding me:

AVENGERS, ASSEMBLE!

*splat*

Thank you.

Thanks to Andrew C., Jaymie P., and Angela N. for actually making me look forward to the day when print is dead.

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot:

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/paper-reams-2025

Posted by Lindsey

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/sundaysweetsbridalshowers2025

Excuse me! Attention, everyone!
I'd like to make a toast to my best friend, the beautiful bride-to-be.

She may have kissed a lot of frogs in the past...

By Flour and Fondant

... but she eventually found Mr. Right, and we were so thrilled when he hopped...
er, popped the question!

They've set a date.

The invitations have been sent.

They've taken their engagement pictures in a field of plumeria and it was the cutest darn thing I've ever seen:

By Clare's Cakes

Barefeet! So cute.

She's ordered her flowers ...

By Christina's Dessertery

... and her dress is already hanging in the closet, awaiting her big day ...

By Vivian of Bespoke Cakes

Now, there's only one thing left to do:

Partaaaay!

Yep, it's bridal shower time!
So sit back and relax, my dear, and enjoy the following bridal shower cakes to mark the occasion. (And I promise I won't do any whining about how bridal shower cakes these days are, like, fifty times awesomer than my wedding cake ever was.)

Holy carp, like this one!

By Rosalind Miller Cakes

Just beautiful. The muted colors are so lovely, it's like looking at a dream. A dream that you can eat! And how about those silhouette figures? Love them.

And speaking of silhouette dreams,

By Berliosca Cake Boutique

... here's another couple finding love in a two-dimensional place.

I just need to point out that this bridal shower cake appears to be twice the size of my wedding cake, but I'm totally not whining. I swear.

And I'm not seething with resentment over this adorable little Stitch and Angel cake topper, either.

By Nerdache Cakes

I mean, I didn't have a cake topper on my bridal shower cake, but oh my goodness, she's wearing a shrug! And little pearl earrings!

And here is another canoodling cake couple so cute I can bearly stand it.

By Julia Hardy, design by Debbie Brown

Haha, they are totally playing footsie. Pawsie?

But we can save the twosomes toppers for later, because today is all about YOU, girlfriend.

By Cake Lady Cakes

That's why we got you this "Wedding Day Survival" kit, filled with all the essentials you may need on the big day. PS: It's filled with cake. What else is there, am I right?

Now, at first glance, this cake might not look like a bridal shower cake, but look again!

By The Pastry Studio

It totally represents your wide circle of friends.
Or that your single life is circling the drain.
Or the circle of life.
You pick.

Anyway, I truly hope your day is perfect, right down to every last itty-bitty embossed, embroidered and mind-blowingly-hand-beaded detail.

By Rosebud Cakes

Congratulations on your big day and happy Sunday, everyone!

*****

P.S. I found something for the bride who wants to wear something old, something new, something borrowed, and something poo:

Unicorn Poop Earrings

Don't stop believing, y'all. Dreams do come true.

You're welcome.

****

And from my other blog, Epbot:

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/sundaysweetsbridalshowers2025

Posted by Jen

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/all-hail-the-pink-king-2025

Ever write an I and a C so close together that they kind of look like the letter K?

Why do I ask?

Oh, no particular reason.

Thanks to Allison E. for the royal screw-up. (And how do you figure the baker knew to use pink icing?)

*****

P.S. You know what goes great with pink icing? An adorable mini waffle maker... in pink:

Mini 4-inch Waffle Maker

So cute, and less than $10!

*****

And from my other blog, Epbot:

https://www.cakewrecks.com/home/all-hail-the-pink-king-2025